Woman left to bring up her young grandson wants to help others grief-stricken when a young adult has died

Every week, at least eight apparently fit and healthy young people under the age of 35 die suddenly of undetected heart conditions.  Siobhan Ryan spoke to a Sussex mother supporting a charity which aims to raise awareness of the risk. 

Losing a child is a parent’s worst nightmare.  Whether it is through a terrible accident or a long illness, coming to terms with grief is a long process. 

For some parents, there may be a small crumb of comfort in knowing exactly how it happened.  Having some kind of explanation can help them understand.  In the case of an illness, there may also be time to prepare and say goodbye.  But when your apparently healthy child suddenly dies, it makes coming to terms with their death even harder.  This is the nightmare Denise Welch has been facing for almost a year. 

Her lively and healthy daughter Michelle showed no signs of ill health but, on November 2 last year, she died at the age of 25.  There were no complaints about feeling unwell or dizzy.  There was no indication that day when Denise spoke to her daughter it would be for the last time. 

Michelle was looking forward to the Lewes bonfire celebrations and planning a great night out.  However she never got there.  Michelle had an undiagnosed genetic heart problem that affected the rhythm of her heart but did not have any symptoms.  The condition would only have shown up if doctors were specifically looking for it.  As there was no reason to, it remained undiagnosed. 

Michelle was living with a time bomb without knowing it.  When her heart stopped there was nothing that could be done.  Even if a fully-trained paramedic had been standing next to her with the right equipment, she would still have died. 

Denise, 46, and her other children Lee, 24 and Tania, 21, are picking up the pieces.  Denise and her husband, Mark, 43, are looking after Michelle’s son Ryan, three, at their home in Lewes.  Her other two children have been checked for heart problems and Ryan will also be closely monitored. 

Denise was tested and discovered her own heart was beating too fast.  She is on beta-blockers to keep it under control.  There is a chance she may have to have a pacemaker in the future. 

Denise said: “Everything was just so sudden.  Michelle was such a lively and healthy person.  She was loud and you always knew when she was around.  “She was very pretty and had a wonderful smile.  She would light up a room and had a lot of friends. 

“She enjoyed walking and kept healthy.  There was no reason to suspect anything was wrong.”  Michelle was also a Manchester United supporter and involved in the Cliffe Bonfire Society. 

Denise said: “It was such a shock when she went.  I wanted answers to try to explain what had happened but there was nothing to focus on. 

“What is there to detect when a 25-year-old just drops dead?  I just could not understand it and I was desperate to find some sort of reason, but there was nothing.  I couldn’t say goodbye.  It was also really difficult to explain things to my grandson when I was trying to deal with my own grief.” 

A few months after Michelle’s death, Denise read in The Argus about an organisation called Cardiac Risk in the Young – or CRY. 

It is a national charity that raises awareness of cardiac risk in the young, offers counselling to relatives and raises money for cardiac screening.  Denise said: “They have been absolutely wonderful and so supportive.  They put me in contact with another parent who had gone through the same thing and she helped me so much.  She said we were members of an exclusive club we did not want to belong to.  She has been there for phone calls, e-mails and is generally just a wonderful support." 

“After Michelle died, there seemed to be no information available to help us.  That’s why the charity is so important and why I want to help it.” 

Denise is encouraging people to buy a copy of a book written in memory of a teenager called Andy Gard, who died suddenly in 1997 of a heart condition.  The book, called 101 Reasons To Get Up In The Morning, was created by Andy’s friend Julie Tanner for the charity’s 10^th anniversary. 

Denise said: “It is coming up to the first anniversary of Michelle’s death and it is going to be a difficult time – but the support from CRY has been amazing.  They need all the help they can get so they can raise money for research and screening so other people don’t have to go through the same thing.”