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She hated sharing,
especially with her younger brother Jack, so I had to buy two of
everything. She adored her niece Holly (left), who is 18 months
old, and couldn’t wait for her to be old enough so that they could watch
Disney films and do girly things together.
We had a very special
mother and daughter relationship and were also best friends. We went
shopping in
Bluewater
every month and she would spend half her wages on shoes and clothes and
I always treated her to lunch.
We spent many nights
just the two of us watching a film with a glass of wine. She would text
me every day to ask what was for dinner as she loved home cooking and
was always hungry. She often rang me on her way home from work to ask if
I wanted a quick glass of wine in our local pub. |
Occasionally we went out
with her friends who always treated me as one the girls and if her dad
wasn’t working he would come too. We always had such good fun and they are
all lovely girls.
Sarah wanted to work abroad
and decided to go to Kos as she went there on holiday the year before and
was told she would be given a job if she wanted one.
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She left in May with her
friend Gemma who had worked there before and who managed to find them a
cheap apartment.
I was worried about her
being away from home for so long because whenever she went on holiday
with her friends she always rang me in tears after a few days as she was
missing me so much.
I encouraged her to go
so that she could become more independent and not waste an opportunity.
In June she picked up a
flu virus and at the same time her wisdom teeth started to come through.
She was prescribed
antibiotics by a doctor and also took a mixture of
paracetamol
for the pain. |
Sarah at her 21st with cousin Laura and a
few of her friends |
She couldn’t work and had no
money for rent or food so I decided to fly her back home so that I could
take care of her. I sent her ticket via email but she had to borrow money to
access the internet.
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Sarah with younger brother
Jack at Dad's 50th |
Her dad met her at
the airport and after enduring 10 hours of travel she was so happy
to see him she clung to him and cried.
I took her to the
hospital the next day as she was very poorly and had lost a lot of
weight and I suspected she had swine flu.
We were seen
immediately and were told that she had damaged her oesophagus due to
taking a combination of tablets.
She gradually got
better and after two weeks of receiving lots of TLC and eating good
food, she was almost back to normal and decided to go back to Kos to
finish the season.
I booked her another
flight and we waved her goodbye again at the beginning of July.
Although I missed
her terribly I was happy that she was able to follow her dream of
working abroad, it was the best time for her to do it as she was
single, unemployed and could start afresh when she returned.
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She enjoyed herself so much,
learned to be independent and described the whole experience as the best
time of her life. She also met and fell in love with a lad, Steve, from
Hull.
Sarah returned home in late
September to attend an interview and Steve travelled down to London every
weekend after to be with her. After three weeks Sarah went to meet his
family and friends in Hull and then they alternated the weekly visits. Steve
decided that he wanted to move to Kent to be near Sarah and started applying
for jobs in London.
The last time we saw her was
on the Friday morning when she said a cheerful goodbye to me and her dad, “see
you on Sunday, love you”, and off she went with her case, she was going
to Hull after work that evening. Steve had travelled down the previous day
to attend an interview and they were meeting up to get the train together.
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On
Saturday, Jon and I went out with friends for dinner and I was in a
deep sleep when at 3.00am on Sunday morning, 29th November, my
mobile phone rang.
The number was unknown and thinking it may be a prank
call or a wrong number I was reluctant to answer it but some
instinct told me I should.
The caller was a
doctor from A&E at Hull Royal Infirmary who told me that we should
get to the hospital as soon as we could as Sarah had collapsed and
had a cardiac arrest. My heart constricted and a fist was clenching
it from inside, it was my worst nightmare come true.
In a daze I told Jon
what had happened and packed a bag with enough clothes for a few
days and we left to start the never ending drive to Hull. All the
way through the pitch black, thick fog I kept telling myself that by
the time we got there she would be awake and wondering what all the
fuss was about. |
Sarah and cousin Emma |
Sarah and Steve had been at
a party and were singing on the karaoke. Sarah had a few drinks and was
enjoying herself but then felt a little unwell and went upstairs to lie
down. She was found a short while later lying on the floor unconscious and
not breathing. A friend tried to resuscitate her whilst an ambulance was
called. She was taken to A&E and then transferred to the intensive care
unit.
We met Steve and his parents
at the hospital and I told them it would be alright. We stayed by her
bedside for three days willing her to wake up but she didn’t. We were told
she was severely brain damaged and after further tests on 1st
December 2009 she was pronounced dead and the life support machines were
turned off. The hospital was unsure what had caused a cardiac arrest so an
autopsy had to be performed. We made the hard decision to drive back to Kent
without her and wait until we could bring her back home.
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Sarah as bridesmaid at uncle’s
wedding with dad, mum and brother |
Four days later the
coroner rang to say the pathologist had discovered that her heart
was the wrong shape and therefore it had to be sent to the Royal
Brompton Hospital in Chelsea to be tested. We decided to donate
Sarah’s heart for research and made arrangements to bring her home
on the following Monday.
Her funeral was on
16th December, the first day of the heavy snows which was
the earliest snowfall in 20 years and lasted around three weeks.
She had a baby pink coffin and was taken to the crematorium in a
white carriage led by two beautiful white horses. We had five cars,
one to lead the procession, which carried the flowers and the other
four with the family following the carriage.
Over 400 people
attended Sarah’s funeral, we played three of her
favourite
songs and one that her Dad chose, and two poems were written and
read by her cousin Emma and best friend Vicki.
At the end of the
service we released 22 pink balloons with her name in her memory. It
was a beautiful service but extremely sad and the worst day of my
life. We decided that only immediate family should buy flowers and
requested that donations be made to the British Heart Foundation.
So far just over
£1,200 has been donated on the
Justgiving
site. |
We finally received the
results on 26thJanuary 2010. We were told that Sarah had
anomalous origin of the left coronary artery from the pulmonary artery (ALCAPA)
which is a rare congenital anomaly that is often referred to as Bland-White
Garland syndrome. It’s estimated to affect 1/300,000 live births and if left
untreated results in a 90% mortality in the first year
of life.
We
were totally stunned and had no idea or any previous warnings that Sarah had
a heart defect. We now have a reason why she died so young and, although it
hasn’t taken away the shock or pain, there is some comfort in the fact that
we had 22 precious years with her. I’m not sure the pain will ever go away,
I have such an empty feeling inside that cannot be filled, but we have such
fantastic memories, photographs and videos that will keep her alive in our
hearts forever.
I began to research
Bland-White Garland Syndrome and realised how rare it is and that it is
virtually undetectable. We were given details of CRY by Dr Mary Sheppard at
The Royal Brompton Hospital who performed the tests and I discovered that
she had received funding to open a CRY Centre at the hospital.
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I met with Dr Mary
Sheppard on 2nd March (right) and handed her a
cheque for £5,000 (a donation given to me by my employer) towards
the research into detecting congenital heart defects in young
people.
Dr Sheppard will be
using Sarah’s case study in lectures to pathologists and students in
order that they can identify more quickly congenital heart defects.
The aim of CRY is to
decrease the number of unexplained deaths in young people and to
have a national screening programme.
I hope that this
money will contribute in some way to saving precious lives so that
other parents don’t have to go through the agony of losing a child. |
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Sarah you created a
storm when you entered this world and when you left it. We were very
privileged and proud to have had you as our daughter and will love you
forever.
Mum xx
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Songs played at Sarah’s funeral
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