She
hardly gave us any problems and she certainly wasn't stroppy or
argumentative, so her sudden death came as a bolt out of the
blue. She had suffered with a sore throat a week prior to her
death and a visit to the doctors confirmed it was Tonsilitis. On
that lovely, sunny Tuesday morning in December, my precious
Rachel never woke up. Our world had stopped in an instant.
Thankfully, the immense support and love of our family and
friends from our local congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses
helped us through the days, weeks and months after with
provisions of cooked meals, visits, cards and flowers. They took
care of our every need, for which myself and Steven are forever
grateful for.
A few
years later, having suffered with recurring palpitations since
my late 20s, I was diagnosed with Dilated Cardiomyopathy, as was
my younger brother. I asked whether Rachel's death was connected
somehow to our condition and I was told there was no connection
and it had been a 'one off' tragedy....I was told this several
times, so I took my medication and didn't worry so much for my
remaining children.
In
December 2008 our son Jason started experiencing palpitations,
so I immediately got him to the doctors and he was referred to a
cardiologist on the 13th January 2009. Jason had an ECG
and was fitted with a 7-day monitor, the results came back fine!
Six
weeks later on the night of 10th March, a healthy Jason went to
bed at 10.30pm and by 12.30am my husband was carrying out CPR on
his son. Attempts by the paramedics and doctors at the hospital
to revive him were unsuccessful. I couldn't believe we were
re-living this nightmare a second time!! We were given as much
time as we needed to be with our beautiful boy and to say our
goodbyes. We held him, we kissed him and just as we had done
with Rachel, we took a lock of his lovely, dark hair. To leave
him alone in the hospital is the hardest thing I have ever had
to do. Yet again, we experienced the caring and comforting
'arms' of our family and friends who are helping us through
these difficult times.
Jason
was a tall, at times shy and handsome young man with 'model'
looks. He had a great sense of humour and we shared many a
'chuckle' with him. His 6'4" height would turn many a young
lady's head and I would feel so proud to be with him at these
moments, but he only had eyes for his sweetheart Amanda, who he
said he was definitely going to marry and had planned to propose
once he reached 18 years of age.
Like
his half sister Rachel, he was a happy teen and always had a
smile for everybody. Music was his passion and he had taught
himself to play the guitar. One of his favourite bands were
McFly. He would often get teased about this at college, but he
didn't care what other people thought. He wouldn't give in to
'peer pressure' and conform, so I loved and respected him for
that. We played Muse's "Starlight" and McFly's "The Last Song"
at his funeral.
Jason
was studying at college for a diploma in 'Child Care Studies' as
he wanted to be a Teaching Assistant. He had such a way with
children, they just warmed to him. Since his death, many parents
have contacted us and told us how Jason had been such a positive
influence on their children and we find some comfort in that and
have no doubt he would have been an asset to the profession. As
you well know, the effects of sudden tragedies are far
reaching... hitting like a freight train everyone who was
connected to Jason, especially his family, girlfriend Amanda and
more so than any other, his sister Kira. I can't begin to
explain how this has devastated her life. To lose two of your
siblings by 11 years of age has been horrendous for her.
Can
anyone survive such intense grief?..yes..because we are proof!
With the help of counsellors, the constant love of those who
care for us and especially our faith, we are learning to cope
each day and at times, step by step.
The
doctors now believe that Rachel and Jason had an inherited
genetic condition and may well have gone on to develop
Cardiomyopathy, but genetic testing has yet to reveal that. Our
main concern now is that of our daughter Kira and my two older
sons. The CRY organisation have helped immensely by
providing information we previously never had and we hope to
have a consultation with Dr Sanjay Sharma in the near future.
We don't need to explain how badly we miss our 'beautiful boy'
and precious daughter. We have constant reminders in the music
they loved so much and we keep their memory alive by carrying on
our family tradition and attending concerts and also by keeping
a smile on our faces. My heart goes out to all you parents,
brothers, sisters, grandparents, cousins and others who have
lost a most beloved child and family member. May your
hearts keep
strong.
Dedicated to the memory of Rachel and Jason........ "I carry
your heart. I carry it in my heart"
